INCREASING DIVORCE RATES

A DOUBLE EDGED SWORD!

Marriage is one of the oldest social institutions,which has stood the test of time but has undergone a triphasic change over the last few decades,and now its very existence is being threatened by the demon of Divorce

The divorce rate is increasing and this increase is being appreciated in all strata of the society(Chop and change-The Sexes,THE WEEK,September 15,2008)
Though it is a very welcome relief,for the ladies,who often had to continue to be abused,mentally,financially,physically and even sexually in a so called marraige,just for the lack of courage or opportunity to demand and get a Divorce! Today,divorce and even re-marraige are being accepted by the society,and the two major factors that made it possible,are woman empowerment, and financial Independence and the social acceptance.But everything good has a flip side too.The Independence of woman,the ease in getting a divorce and re marraige,are a great deterrent to adjustments,compromises and in fact are redefining the definition of a marraige !

Originally the marriage had fixed water tight roles ,consisting of a man who provided the protection and was almost the master,of his wife who obeyed without questioning his supremacy.
As times passed and poeple became educated,the marriage saw a welcome change of companionship between the spouses with a willing agreement of sharing the responsibilities of the family,in and outside the house
And the third change ,which has recently creeped in,has reduced marriage to a undesireable state of contract of convenience where two independent individuals spend time under the same roof,often supposedly,leading their own lives,without any emotional bond or social obligation,and with ever-ready bags to move out,not only of the house but the life of the spouse.
The major reason of this is the upwardly mobile attitude of man and woman,with career taking over family and money over emotions.The woman is no longer dependent on the man,and either can buy any pleasure in life ,even though temporarily ,by virtue of their money or status.With surrogate mothers and artificial insemination,and easy laws of adoption even the biological reason of reproduction,for marraige has been terminated.
This is however a very sad state of affairs,as independent or single living lasts till one is young,Divorce not only has a unrepairable detremental impact on the kids but leaves the person desperately lonely in old age ,to die alone in an old age home or a five star nursing home!
Every person should work hard in their relationship with their spouse to keep the marriage happily on,and to fight this alarmingly increasing incident of divorce

Dr Sanjay Kapoor Lucknow