BREATHING SPACE

Commitment doesn't mean surrendering personalities
each of us are unique and have the right to live lives our way,within the norms of society and without depriving others of their rights or hurting dear and near ones
being different does not mean being indifferent
we can luv each other without aping the person we luv
we need our breathing space
Sometimes we feel relationships are all about supporting each other in times of need. That's what friends and family are for, we think.But there are times when we go overboard in our expectations. We expect their lives to hinge on our feelings and opinions.For instance, you've been ill for a while now. Is it fair to expect your family and friends to do little other than rally around you? Would you deem it disloyal if they also had a life of their own? If they did enjoy an outing, a get together would you think badly of them? Your friend has done you a grave injustice. And obviously the relationship between you both has suffered. Would you expect your mutual friends to pick up cudgels on your behalf? And have nothing to do your erstwhile friend? Or worse, fight on your behalf?It is important to remember that every person is an individual in his or her own right and is entitled to an opinion.The best way to have a lasting relationship with anyone is to be realistic in your expectations. Be it your buddy, brother or betrothed, your sister, your spouse or your parents, every one of them is entitled to make a decision that might be different from your assessment of the situation.But it is important that you do not pass judgement harshly on them. Accept people the way they are. They have to lead their own lives. And, remember, you might well do the same in their place.Your enemy's friend is not your enemy. People who feel good when you feel bad are not villains. People aren't indifferent because they think different.Your relationships will thrive a lot better if only you learn to live and let live.
sanjay

INTRAPERSONAL RELATIONSHIP

KNOW YOURSELF,BEFORE LOVING SELF OR OTHERS
Knowing yourself is the initial mandatory requirement, rather than loving oneself, before you start loving someone else.
To love self or to love someone else, it is essential that one knows oneself well, The knowledge of our strengths, our weaknesses, our capability of adjustments, sharing, cooperation and our ability to accept the others is the basic requirement to start any relationship, We must know the expectations we have, if any, in that relationship and our limitations to go into a relationship with someone superior or less privileged than us, without getting complexes
For this, spending time with oneself and analyzing ones own views are a must. Loving self can follow but only after we know ourselves well and this should be done cautiously, Loving oneself without knowing self can be dangerous. Once we start loving ourselves then it becomes difficult to adjust in most relationships. We are then a bit difficult to accept views of others and even healthy criticism
Men are definitely as emotional as women, if not more, and they should not hesitate in expressing it, provided the expressed emotions are genuine, Fake emotions lead to fake relationships. Even fake and halfhearted acceptances and patches can be dangerous for any relationship. Anger though a common emotion, should not be the only one to be expressed to show possessiveness or hurt
Know yourself, know the other and then get into a relationship. Love will automatically follow, But let knowing self and other be a continuous process, Age, time circumstances and commitments keep changing every individual, and accepting these is essential for continuation of any healthy relationship